Luke and I went to a new mom group meet up in our neighborhood yesterday morning, a first for us. While I found out Luke was pretty big for his age at his 2nd month well visit, I didn't really think much of it. 

At the meet up I realized just how big Luke is for his age. He was the youngest baby there at 3.5 months but bigger than the oldest babies that were 5 and 6 months old. When we went around making introductions I assumed everyone else's babies were younger than Luke. :O 

Rarely ever seeing other infants, we didn't have anyone to compare Luke to but yesterday it became very evident to me that right now Luke is humungo for his age! There was another baby born one day before Luke and she weighed 14 lbs, 3.5 lbs less than Luke.

I think the other moms could tell I was just as shocked and quickly reassured me that there's nothing wrong with Luke's size. But I have to admit I felt a little bit self conscious about my super-sized baby. I don't ever try to overfeed Luke and always stop nursing him when he pulls away. Oh well, I guess Luke has a hearty appetite like his mom.

I doubt Luke will continue to be the biggest kid on the block as he grows, he is Asian after all, but for now he has the distinction of being the biggest baby in the group. That's my boy!

Anyways, once I got past the surprise of Luke's size we had a good time at the meet up. Luke totally charmed the ladies in the group with his killer smiles and giggling. It was his first time interacting with other people his age (at the birth class reunion he was oblivious of the other babies). It was so adorable to see the babies making eye contact with each other and smiling. Luke's still working on his laugh but he will randomly let out giggles. It's the sweetest sound to my ears! 

We sat next to a mom from the UK named Sarah and her adorable daughter Francesca. Luke was smitten! They made eye contact, he smiled, she smiled back and then he started giggling! I snapped a quick photo on my iPhone (sorry it's blurry). 

I'm still a total newb when it comes to these mom groups, play dates and baby activities but Luke was a natural!

We had our birthing class reunion tonight. We took a great 5 week class at our hospital with 8 other expecting couples. It was such a cool experience to be with all these other folks expecting around the same time, going through similar experiences and emotions. We had a great instructor named Jo, who did a wonderful job teaching with so much heart and enthusiasm.

During our reunion we went around and each shared our birthing experience from the mom and dad's points of view. It was like we were sharing battle stories! :O It turned out half the moms ended up with c sections! Definitely more than the hospital average and more than we all expected.

I think all the other moms that had c sections had it a lot tougher than I did. I think my labor and recovery was pretty easy compared to the things they shared. After hearing their stories I feel encouraged to revisit our birth story and write it down so we can remember and one day share with Luke if he wants to hear it. Gonna try and sift through the notes we took and write it out.

Here's a cute photo from the reunion:

Luke wasn't a fan of the photo portion of the reunion. Kekee Too cute!! We loved seeing all the babies together!

Happy 2 Months to our baby boy! I will probably say this every month, but I can't believe how fast and how slow time is going by. Fast in the sense that, wow our little one is growing up so quickly but slow in the sense that how can it only be two months? I feel like Luke's been with us much longer than that. 

Growth/Developments

Luke had a huge growth spurt this past month!

At his two week appointment: Weight 9.7 lbs Height 22 inches Head 38.1 cm

Today at his 2 month check up: Weight 15 lbs Height 24.5 inches Head 41.3 cm

I never knew or bothered to look up what growth percentiles Luke was in before but our pediatrician told us today that for Luke's weight he's in the 98th percentile and for his height about 93rd percentile for 2 month olds. Our little baby is getting so big and heavy!!

I love this set of photos of Luke taken after a good night's sleep. He's so smiley and happy in the morning. He looks so mischievous in these photos.

Two weeks ago while I was holding him I went to pick something off the floor and strained something in my back. I'm really out of shape but it probably didn't help that I was holding my little butterball.

Luke's vision and attention span has also started to get better and increase. We noticed that he seemed to focus on objects and would look around his room when we put him in his crib, so we got him a mobile and put picture books in as well for him to check out. 

After he wakes up from a nap, he can entertain himself in his crib for up to 30 minutes sometimes! We'll put his mobile on and watch him coo and smile at it in the baby monitor. 

Luke also discovered his hand, or rather has discovered the art of putting this thing that comes near his face in his mouth to occasionally gnaw on. He finds a way to bust one arm out of his swaddle to put it in his mouth. 

My favorite development of the month is his smiles! He gives us the biggest smiles in the morning after a good nap and when we talk to him. I LOVE to see him smile and try to catch his cute little mug on camera whenever I can to show my parents. Luke's smiles totally melt my heart and make both me and Oppa all moony!   Continue reading →

First time taking Luke "shopping". Grandma Lee wanted to check things out so we went to keep her company. Luke wasn't so excited.

I saw my OB/GYN today for the 6 week postpartum checkup. The doctor said my uterus was almost back to its pre pregnancy size, the incision and area are healed up nicely and my blood pressure is totally normal. Glad to hear all this news but the most surprising thing was that I'm already back at my pre preggo weight! :O Say what?!?! I guess it's all the breastfeeding.

However, my body is definitely different now. It's sorta sad but I feel like a deflated balloon. I was so blown up when I was pregnant and now well everything is sorta soft and squishy (sorry if this is TMI for anyone that comes across this post ). I've pretty much lost all muscle tone, even in my legs which is a first in my life. My usually ginormous calves have shrunk. :O

Thankfully my doctor said I'm good to start exercising again and resuming all usual activities so I'm looking forward to getting back into shape (well some sort of shape) and fight the ajumma body that inevitably will come on full force in a few years.   Continue reading →

How is it possible that a month has passed since Luke was born?!?! Oppa and I keep saying it to each other but seriously what did we do this past month?! Actually we know -we've been changing Luke's diapers, feeding, burping, putting him to sleep and then repeat over and over again!

Luke about to take his first cab ride

Life at Home

When we left the hospital, it became so real to both Oppa and I that Luke was ours and that he was for keeps. We were both so nervous to take him home in the cab and get him inside our apt.

So tiny in his car seat!

Oppa and I have been so touched by our friends and family throughout the entire pregnancy but during the first week we really were completely humbled and overwhelmed by the love and generosity of our friends and community in NYC. 

Since Luke came early and my parents weren't scheduled to come until Dec 27, our pastor's wife Bethany set up a MealBaby registry for us so that people could bring us food. I thought I would be able to handle cooking and taking care of Luke but thank goodness Bethany convinced us to set up MealBaby! It was so wonderful not to have to worry about meals especially since I didn't anticipate the c section or the longer recovery period.

Our good friends Janet and Jason also helped us a great deal by not only bringing over so much food but by Janet showing us how to take care of Luke. I'm so thankful for her expertise as a NICU nurse! In and out of the hospital I've learned the most about caring for Luke from the nurses in my life!  Continue reading →

Note to self (and anyone else reading): I blogged detailed updates each day leading up to Luke's birth and kept this post privatized until 3 months after Luke was born. 

37 Weeks! My big, baby belly!

Thursday, Dec 8 2011

Went to see Dr. Lieu for a regular checkup appt. Found out I gained 8 pounds (212) since my last appt!!! 8 pounds in 1.5 weeks?!?!? How that happened I have no idea but that was definitely alarming to me and Dr. Lieu. 

On top of that my blood pressure was 145/90, which was definitely the highest it's ever been. Usually I'm between 110/70 to 120/80 so this was definitely not good news. 

In addition to the weight gain and high blood pressure, my legs were swollen like an elephants so this was enough for Dr. Lieu to send me straight to St Luke's for bloodwork for preeclampsia.

Good news from the appt -Pumpkin's heartbeat was steady and in good range, and I am already 2-3 centimeters dialated! Woohoo!

I had to head straight to St Luke's Labor and Delivery on the 12th floor via taxi. After another urine sample, several vials of blood and 3 hours of waiting while being monitored on a bed (1 monitors was for Pumpkin's heartbeat and the other was to see if I was having any contractions -which I was, but very light!) they told me all the tests came back negative and I could leave! So very thankful that nothing was seriously wrong! Praise God! 

As excited as we are to meet Pumpkin we definitely need some more time to get ready.  

After the hospital, we had to go straight to Gabrien and Rusan's for Gabrien's birthday potluck. It was a fun night with good friends! While at their apt I used the bathroom and encountered "bloody show" when I wiped! One of the signs of impending labor! I was excited but stayed calm as everything I'd read about this sign said that there was no indication that this would mean the baby was coming right away.

I told oppa about it and we both realized that the baby may make his appearance sooner than we thought!

When we got home I immediately packed my hospital bag and made a list of things I need to get done this weekend/asap!

Plan "Get Ready for Pumpkin!" is in full swing!!  Continue reading →

I've been half writing blog posts and then saving them in private for the past couple of weeks. I've promised myself I would catch up on these posts during our 6th anniversary/babymoon trip but the internet connection here has been pretty spotty.

Sorry to anyone that randomly stops by -I'm the worst blogger ever (I can't even call myself a blogger)! 

So here's a random update pieced together from other posts I intended to share...

1) From talking with mom friends I've learned that you really can't plan for your birth. You can prepare yourself by reading books, taking classes, doing tons of research, etc but there's really no telling what kind of birth you'll have until it happens. I have a really good mom friend that prepped for months to have a natural, birthing center birth (as little medical intervention as possible) and she ended up having an emergency c section because the baby was breech and his umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck twice. Ack!  Continue reading →

Two Mondays ago we went in for the 20 week anatomy ultrasound. We learned this is the exam where they check on the development of the baby's heart, brain, vital organs and basic anatomy including sex. I was really anxious about this exam for a number of reasons.

The main reason was because our first ultrasound results (measure of the nuchal translucency) came out slightly on the abnormal side, meaning there is an elevated risk our baby could have a chromosomal defect. I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried about this.

After speaking with a genetic counselor, our doctor, my parents, some close friends (who have gone through the same situation) and a lot of praying we decided we wouldn't pursue any genetic testing. There were a lot of different factors that went into this decision, but the main one was that genetic testing doesn't correct or change any result of having a child with a chromosomal defect. Also for me the chance of miscarrying no matter how low really scared me, especially if we found out there was nothing wrong with our child. We decided that if our child is born with any defects we'd face these challenges as they came. 

Another reason why I was anxious and excited about the exam was because I really wanted to know if we were having a boy or girl. After the results of the first ultrasound my preference for either went out the door, and my main desire was to have a healthy child. I know that sounds cliche but the exam really put things in perspective for me. 

However, as the weeks went by and I found more peace with our decision, I started to realize that I really did have a preference and it sort of surprised me. I wanted a boy.  Continue reading →

Last Sunday night as I got situated in bed (s-shaped preggo pillow -check, euro square pillow -check, tempurpedic mushy pillow -check, no blankets on my side of the bed -check), I suddenly felt a strange feeling in my belly. I thought to myself 'did I just imagine that?!'

Ever since I read that at 16 weeks you can start to feel the baby (they say it feels like fluttering or gas bubbles ), I tried to pay more attention to my belly and see if I could distinguish anything going on in there. Several mom friends said they couldn't feel anything until week 20, so while I was disappointed I hadn't felt anything yet, I wasn't too worried.

Then last Sunday night I felt this little twinge in my belly. I immediately called out to oppa and told him I think I felt the baby. I was so excited and hoped the baby would kick again. Oppa ran over and put his hand on my stomach, and then it happened again! 

We both freaked out in excitement that we were able to feel the kick together! 

I told oppa to talk to the baby. With every affectionate phrase, our baby kicked back in response. We were elated!

So many folks ask me how I've been feeling and if anything seems really different now that I'm pregnant. To be honest, I didn't really feel pregnant until this week. I'm obviously showing now (the belly is definitely a more distinguishable round shape and not just a bulging ddongbae), and with the kicking this week I feel reassured that there is actually a baby in there.

Every time I feel a little kick I imagine our little one playing and squirming around in my stomach. It's so hard to describe how it makes me feel, but I get so happy feeling this tiny being in my stomach. This might sound awful, but I'm only now starting to fall in love with this baby.

Pregnancy and a baby had felt like a distant concept to me for so long that I held my affections and hopes for a baby at arm's length. Even until this past week, I wondered why I didn't feel this strong sense of love and excitement like so many of my pregnant friends did the moment they found out they were pregnant.

I had to admit to myself I was scared and trying to protect my heart from the chance of disappointment again. I know that there is always the chance that something could go wrong but now when I start to feel negativity or doubt I just pray and give thanks for this baby.

I'm now starting to feel more freedom to express love toward our baby, and I allow myself to dream and hope for this little one. My heart is full of gladness and thankfulness! We are greatly blessed to have gotten pregnant, and I never want to forget that! 

I'm so glad it wasn't my imagination! Baby -kick, kick, kick away!

Baby at 13 weeks 

-I'm convinced all the running I did in February and March is the reason why I got pregnant (well the running and God).  

-Subway veggie delights are my new best friend. I'm amazed that's the only thing I can repeatedly eat without feeling like crap. I started eating them during the worst part of the first trimester and still love them now 17 weeks in!

-I'm actually looking forward to looking more pregnant. I just look really full all the time -like major ddongbae action. 

-Suseok oppa has been amazing, accommodating, angelic even. I'm so thankful for his love and care for me! I know he'll be an amazing dad. However, I question my tolerance of pain, annoyance and lack of sleep.

-We were having the hardest time thinking of names so we gave up and will try again when we find out the sex of the baby. All the names I "claimed" for my future children when I was younger don't seem appropriate or go well with oppa's last name.

-I love that my parents call the baby Jin Su/Su Jin! They took our Korean names and put them together to make up a boy's name and girl's name for fun. 

-The phantom twitching in my left leg above my knee and in my left butt cheek had me pretty freaked out but after a quick search on Dr. Google I found out this is only the beginning in the random aches and pains that happen during pregnancy.  

-Repeatedly I find myself saying "I feel like an alien has taken over my body" to explain how I feel. kekeke 

-Family/friends' reactions to the photo above:

"Whoa the baby is definitely Korean -big head and short legs!"

"You're having a Sour Patch Kid!"